Get Loaded in the Park 2005

by Isla MC

Nursing a double hangover and reeling from a traumatic/hilarious bedroom incident the night before is not the best way to experience a summer one-day festival. Yes, it was a beautiful summers day. Yes, there were lots of attractive people having a nice time. Yes, it was a Bank Holiday weekend so everyone was in a celebratory mood but, frankly, all I wanted to do was crawl under a cool dark rock away from the noise and the bodies and go to sleep. I’m sure it was lovely for the people who were in the mood for it – booze, food, music, sun, dancing, what more could you ask? – but I’m afraid, in my fragile state, all these things were just conducive to me being a moody bint. Sorry Jo.

There were A LOT of people crammed in to the site on Clapham Common. Too many, I thought. Obviously, the people are what it’s all about, but too many and you start wishing they’d all fuck off. Tourette’s-like thoughts start popping manically into your head. Haven’t these wankers got homes to go to? What the fuff is his problem? Does she know that outfit makes her arse look the size of a missile? Oh wait, it is the size of a missile. And so on. At one point I thumped a guy in the back when he trod on my toes and elbowed me in the face without an apology, and a row ensued. Fortunately I managed to diffuse the situation with a rare bit of diplomacy, but honestly, where are peoples’ manners?

Musically there wasn’t much to get your teeth into. What was with all the indie bands doing DJ sets? I mean, I suppose it’s nice in a way to find out Snow Patrol (read our interview in INTERVIEWS section) like the same Dusty Springfield track as me, but these DJ sets were as exciting as when your mate comes back to yours after the pub and starts fiddling around with your cds. It didn’t register that it was Snow Patrol or Elbow or Carl Barat who had chosen these tracks. It didn’t provide any insight into the band or why they make the music they do. It could have been the guy from the checkout at my local Sainsbury’s up there choosing the tracks and I would have felt exactly the same thing – not bloody much at all.

Paul Oakenfold, Fatboy Slim and Armand Van Helden were great. Proper high quality DJs doing their thing and doing it well. Although why a massive artist like Armand was crammed into a tiny tent that held about fifty people is beyond me. If you hadn’t been waiting in there since about nine am you had no chance. Stereo MC’s again. Why do they do it to themselves? Why? Although we caught ‘Connected’ this time and that was pretty cool. The Happy Mondays were the highlight. They were wicked and the crowd loved it and I was very excited to see Bez. One man and his maracas. What a legend.

In conclusion, Get Loaded In The Park was alright. I ate a nice pie. I saw Howard Marks. There was free water. I saw lots of people having a lovely time. Musically, however, it could have been much more exciting. Raise your game next time, Get Loaded. Raise your game.

Producer’s note: Since Isla was suffering from the above ‘ailments’ I thought I should put in my two cents about my slightly less unbiased experience at Get Loaded. I too was a bit tired and slightly hungover, but my bedroom experiences from the night before weren’t anything out of the ordinary. I agree that the line up could’ve been a lot better. The DJ sets were done by impressive people, but I would’ve much rather have heard Snow Patrol, Elbow and Carl Barat play their own music live. The Happy Mondays, Fatboy Slim, and Armand Van Helden were awesome. It was a bit of an experience to get to see them though. Armand played in a tent that fit about a dozen people so we had to sit outside and leave all visuals to the imagination. Stereo MCs made me laugh but only because the singer was dancing even when the music wasn’t playing – man he is MESSED up! Verdict – a good festival for a sunday in Clapham Common. Especially if you’re a south Londoner!

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